Ugh. It is starting. I knew it would be difficult during Thanksgiving and Christmas but I didn't realize it would suck so bad!! Geeze I just find myself wanting to be with my ex-husband. I wish we could be decorating together and do Christmas shopping together...all the wintery and couply things!
I texted a few friends and mentors saying I was strugglingggg. They replied and said we can make new memories. Yeah yeah...I know I can make new memories...but wait. No that is literally what I need to do! They are right!
I have found that it is hard for me to go back home, because everywhere I look, I see places I would go with my ex-husband and things we would do together. It makes me sad!
My sweet friends from back home reminded me that we GET to make new memories! They planned a hot coco, cookies and Hallmark movies night for when I am back just to help me with the thought of being without him this season...and all the ones for the rest of my life.
This isn't just, "dang it! I don't get to see him this Christmas but at least I will get to see him for New Years!"...nope it is like okayyyyy so I will NEVER get to see him during any holidays. Ever. and this is weirddddd you guys. SUPER WEIRD! I planned my whole life being with him forever and ever!
My wonderful mentor Jenny reminded me that it is okay to have hard days. Nobody expects to travel a hard season with a smile on their face every day. She said this is the first holiday season without him and that she has been PRAYING FOR ME ALREADY. Okay WHAT! WOW God has blessed me with great people in my life to pray ahead of time for me. That is amazing.
Jenny also challenged me to shift my focus to what my new traditions get to be! I shouldn't focus on "ugh me and him used to do this" but instead focus on "okay yay well now I get to do this!"
I challenge you to do two things:
1) look at what you GET to do because of your situation. Maybe someone you were close to passed away and you won't see them this year, but what you GET to do, is make new memories. Maybe you just went through a break-up or divorce and your situation is kind of like me. Your person is probably down the street, but you don't get to see them and celebrate together. What you DO get to do is make those new memories! I am doing it too, my friend. Let's do it together!
2) I challenge you to pray ahead of time, like Jenny. Jenny told me she has been praying for this holiday season for me for a while. That was a wonderful thing for me to hear, and it calmed my worries. Pray for those you love and for things that are upcoming. Pray for their loved one's birthday if they have passed away. That day will be tough, especially the first ones. Pray for the holiday seasons in general, you don't always know what people are going through but God sure does.
How can I be praying for YOU? Is this holiday season hard for you? Me too, pal. I would love to pray for you. Drop a prayer request in the box on the home page!
xoxo,
Morgan Leigh
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